I Used to Run from Everything—Here’s What Changed
💌 Written by Alix
I don’t know about you, but I run from emotions faster than you can say avoidant. People admire this 'tough girl' front—sarcastic, witty, unapologetic. But behind the mystery? I’ve been, for lack of a better phrase, emotionally constipated.
Honestly, I didn’t know this until I dated my current partner. Relationships aren’t just about dates and riding off into the sunset on your boyfriend’s Harley—they’re also about vulnerability.
Like… what??? Baring my emotions to someone??? I’d rather set my bass guitar on fire. But… five months in, things started falling apart when my partner admitted he barely knew me.
Love can really drive you places—trust me, I’d know. Emotional vulnerability wasn’t in my vocabulary, and yet… here I was, trying to figure it out.
I asked the universe for a sign, and boom—there it was. A zine at The Girlfriend Gazette called "The Art of Being Seen." It practically screamed at me.
What I read felt like a full-on awakening—like my emotional constipation finally had a cure. That’s when it hit me:
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I used to call it independence, but really, I was afraid to need someone.
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I avoided hard conversations and called it 'keeping the peace.’
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Love only suffocates when you refuse to breathe it in. So… breathe!!!
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Keeping things light meant detaching, but loneliness? That was heavier. (Sappy, I know—who even am I?).
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Healing wasn’t letting go of my independence. It was realizing real love lets you be free and held simultaneously.
Avoidance is a vicious cycle. The more you run from emotional vulnerability, the more people and situations chase you—so you keep running.
I know a lot of girls like me gravitate toward avoidance—it feels safe, a shield against sh*tty men, friendships, and situations (trust me, I get it). But life starts to feel half-lived when you keep shutting yourself out.
If this called you out (in a good way), send it to a friend who needs to hear it too.
